Why I moved back to the Midwest…

The East is a completely alien land compared to the Midwest. The Midwest was alive, calm, and comfortable. I could remember the first snow of winter that blanketed everything in sight. I remembered Christmas day and the many trains that I became accustomed to. The East just seemed empty. The East is filled with reckless spending, ostentatious lifestyles, and cowardice. There seem to be little to no morals in the Eggs. The wealthy hide behind their money in order to disregard responsibility and consequence. I have seen the East’s true character. The East is uncaring and vapid. It may seem full of life and people, but in reality, it is completely barren. I could not stand to be around that kind of life any longer. I needed morals, truth, and comfort. Moving back to the Midwest gave me great perspective on life and the human condition.

What I was thinking when I first met Mr. Gatz…

When Mr. Gatz arrived at Jay Gatsby’s mansion, I was shocked to find that Gatsby did indeed have a family. He never mentioned his father before. I wondered if he was ashamed of his family’s past and his relatively average life before he moved to West Egg. I was curious about Gatsby’s mysterious origins. Did Mr. Gatz know about his son’s success? I thought about Gatsby’s relationship with his father. I wondered how long it has been since he had contact with his family. It must have been hard for Mr. Gatz to hear about his son’s death, after being separated from him for such a long period of time. The pain on his face was an unsettling sight to see. At that moment, I wished that I could have said something to take away that look of anguish.

What I was feeling when I found out about Gatsby’s death…

I was shocked to find that Gatsby had been murdered in his own pool. It was saddening that he would be gone forever. I had a heavy feeling in my gut that told me that I would never again see him standing outside, looking at the green light across the water. I couldn’t imagine how, just a short time ago, I had just talked to a man that is now deceased. It angered me that he was the one to take the punishment for Daisy’s hysterics. It is frustrating that the wealthy can just hide behind their money, like a shield, and never take responsibility for their actions. They are uncaring people, unlike Gatsby. I felt like Gatsby was the only “real” and genuine man of the east. He was better than all of the others combined, and I immediately missed his hopeful spirit.

Why I didn't tell Daisy about Tom and Myrtle's affair...

Even though I knew about Tom and Myrtle’s affair, I could not tell Daisy. In my mind, getting involved with their marriage was not a task I wanted to perform. Their marital status was a burden that was their responsibility to work out, not mine. Tom was the only person obligated to inform Daisy of his moral ambiguity. Moreover, I could not break Tom’s trust in my confidentiality. The central reason why I could not open Pandora’s Box was because I could not stand to see my dear cousin, Daisy, be in such emotional pain. In truth, I would not even know what to say, or how to bring up such a topic. I’m not the type of man capable of handling this sort of sensitive topic. I decided that inaction would be the best choice for this situation.

What I was feeling at Tom and Myrtle's party...

When I attended Myrtle and Tom’s party, I felt slightly exasperated and anxious. I am not a very social man, and attending such gatherings formed an unavoidable uneasiness. I did not know what to say. I was in unfamiliar and uncomfortable territory. Being in a crowd of the elite and superficial was very bothersome. I started to feel sick and clammy. After hearing the incorrect rumors concerning Tom and Daisy’s marriage, I was irritated. It disturbed me that, for recreation, these people would binge on the rumors that were fed to them. The completely vapid conversation and the brazen behavior of the guests were disgusting. At the same time, I was fascinated by the complete contrast of the environment from what I have always known. As soon as the alcohol started to sink in, I was a touch calmer. I enjoyed absorbing the chatter and activity of the wealthy and privileged.

What I was thinking when Tom asked me to meet "his girl"...

When Tom first invited me to meet his mistress, I was slightly perplexed. Why would he ask me? I was Daisy’s cousin. To any other man, asking your spouse’s relative to meet your mistress would be an incredibly idiotic plan. I wondered why he trusted me with such an enormous and potentially marriage-shattering secret. Perhaps, to him, I seemed like a reserved and trustworthy gentleman that would not even think about revealing the grim truth. He was correct in his assumption. I wondered if Daisy was completely ignorant of this situation. How much did she really know? What caused this moral collapse? It was possible that Daisy was the catalyst in Tom’s loss of faith. Although, they could both be equally be at fault. Their ostentatious displays and constant merrymaking could, also, have led to their detachment. Marriage and life in the Eggs was very unlike my common perception.